Blocked no more!

I apologize for my extended absence, as well as for recently blocking my reader(s) from ye olde blog. You see, I've been on a job hunt, having finally grown weary with Marketing Person Drama and its accompanying mild but unsavory fantasies of maiming and disfigurement, mostly in the form of I-wish-she'd-get-paper-cuts-and-chip-her-pedicure. (The fitness-for-stress-relief thing, I admit with great shock, is on hiatus for a variety of reasons, forcing my return to Visualization and Deep Breathing techniques. Also, french fries. And maybe Oreos).

I digress. As part of my job hunt, I applied to a sassy, hip, almost-too-cool-for-school company for a job I was certain I had no chance of getting (incidentally, I felt the exact same way when I applied for my current job. I am perhaps not the best at picking up on Subtle Life Patterns). When they asked me to fill out an extensive survey and called for an interview, I figured the blog might should go underground, as I wanted to demonstrate my passion, work ethic, and organizational skills before they read an extensive narrative featuring my hoo-hah.

Of course, this is ridiculously self-aggrandizing, since this blog never shows up when I google my name, and I doubt that despite a two and a half hour interview, they *might* not go so far as to have a private investigator hack into my computer for a peek at my internet shenanigans. At least, not before they started thinking about throwing money my way.

Anyway, after an interview process that makes the nerve-wracking national spelling bee contest look like a quick game of rock-paper-scissors (without the lizard-spock, for you Big Bang Theory fans), I got the job. And last Monday, I resigned from my current gig.

It was painful, even as much as I knew I just needed to rip off that psychological Band-aid that has kept me tethered to this company. You see, I luuuurve the people with whom I work--they are enormously talented, and--God willing--will do great things with this company once it can get out of its own way. Plus, this job saw me through the transition to Utah from Back East, propped (and, frankly, mopped) me up during my divorce, and is where I met my Aforementioned Work Friend who is now Boyfriend.

The people I most dreaded telling were my first boss, the Big Cahuna Himself, and my former boss, a woman with a heart of gold who occasionally hits the Bitch-booze a little too hard. But I did, and they were ridiculously--almost maddeningly--sweet about it. Others were equally nice--they said they'd miss me and often took the opportunity to confess that for them, too, the company Has Some Issues. But they are staying.

However much people say they will miss me, I can see how quickly the company will absorb whatever hole I've left behind. A colleague told me that leaving a job is like pulling your hand out of a bucket of water--a bit splashy for a second, but the void of water is swallowed up immediately, leaving nary a ripple behind. This is comforting for someone so self-absorbed that she agonized over how the company could even manage to open its doors for business every day in her absence.

As I look forward to the New Chapter, I have realized two things: one, that one is always replaceable, that no matter how narcissistic one's fantasies are, and two, people who care about you can be genuinely happy for you, even when you do something that's inconvenient for them.

In between worrying about COBRA and 401(k)s and Whether or Not I am Good Enough for the job (or at least as good as they think I am), I am contemplating these truths about change and loss and friends.

Also, I am trying to figure out whether getting a tiny, tasteful nose ring installed would in any way affect the bonus structure at the new place.